Weekly Workout Recap: 04/13/2020 - 04/19/2020

I'm still going strong with my workouts, but I do feel like I need to start mixing it up a bit.  I've been doing the same arm and leg weight workouts recently, and need to take the time to find something different soon.  But in the mean time here is this week's Recap...

Workouts:

Monday
Arm Workout

Tuesday
3ish mile walk

Wednesday
Arm Workout

Thursday
10.72 bike ride

This was my longest bike ride yet, and it felt great!  I'm surprised by just how much I have been enjoying riding my bike.

Friday
Core/Back Workout

Saturday
Leg Workout

Sunday
4.25 mile walk

Just when I had finally decided that my calf was almost back to normal, it started flaring up halfway through this walk.  Grrrr!

A few photos from the walk...


Really pretty sunset!...

Weekly Workout Recap: 04/06/2020 - 04/12/2020

I'm still going strong with my workouts, but still no running was done. As soon as all of my spring races were switched to virtual races, I seem to have lost my running mojo. That combined with the fact that my calf still isn't feeling 100% yet has me turning my attention elsewhere for some exercise recently. But I will be back to running eventually - I do still have two virtual 5K's to run after all!

Here is this week's Recap...

Workouts:

Monday
Aaptive "Upper Body Flex" Arm Workout
1.5 miles walk with two of my dogs...



Tuesday
10 minute aerobic dance workout
10 mile bike ride (my farthest ride to date!)
75 Tricep Push-Ups

Here are some photos from the bike ride...







Wednesday
Jillian Michaels "Killer Arms & Back" Level 1 30 Minute Workout
25 Tricep Push-Ups

Thursday
1.5ish mile walk

Friday
3ish mile walk with one of my pups

Saturday
Yin Yoga

Sunday
3.5 mile hike

I met my parents for an Easter hike today.  Here are a handful of random photos from our adventure...

Weekly Workout Recap: 03/30/2020 - 04/05/2020

I'm still feeling like I have had pretty good momentum with my workouts. It's not exactly hard to fit them in while in quarantine. I was on call Monday through Friday this week; however, I ended up only have to go in three of the five days and only for a few hours each day.  So, I still had more than enough time to exercise to my heart's content.

I'm SO FREAKING HAPPY that I decided to splurge and buy a bike last week. There really aren't words for how much I am enjoying getting out and riding in the evenings. Unfortunately, riding does make my neck and shoulder issues flare up a bit so I can't ride every day but I'm thrilled to be riding as much as I can.

I'm glad that I decided to purchase the ankle weights while I was out, too. It's been nice to have the option of using those for some leg exercise here and there. It's just taking a little bit to think outside of the box for things to do now that I can't go to the gym after work every day. Although, in all honesty I am working out a lot harder now than I was when I was going to the gym. I'm not working out after a long exhausting day at work, so I have a lot more energy to give to the workouts. I'm also just feeling more motivation for working out overall. I guess my thinking is that if I'm in quarantine all this time, I'm going to do everything I can to use the time to my advantage.

Thus far the only thing lacking in my recent exercise routine is doing any actual running, but more on that later. For now here is this week's Recap...

Workouts:

Monday
Leg workout with my ankle weights

Tuesday
1.5ish mile walk

Since today was the last day of the month, it wrapped up month three in a row of closing all of my Apple Watch rings, and getting at least 30 minutes of exercise every day since January 1st. This is a huge deal to me and I'm pretty proud of myself for sticking to it, so here's a photo from the app of my March accomplishment...



Wednesday
5.6 mile bike ride

Thursday
Yin Yoga

Friday
Arm workout with my dumbbells
5.9 mile bike ride

I made the decision to start wearing masks as much as possible when I go out. I was unable to find any actual masks, of course. However, I was able to find some cloth ones online that I have on order. But lucky for me, I have TONS of scarves at home because I've acquired a collection over the years for dog photos.

Here I am wearing one of my homemade masks using one of the scarves I had around home...



I saw a little 'wildlife' on my ride and I had to stop and take photos...





Saturday
6.7 mile bike ride

No photos from my ride today, but when I got home I decided to take my dogs to Dairy Queen for pup cups in celebration of one of my dog's birthday.

Here I am with 3 of the 4.  The other goober is camera shy and hard to get in photos!...



It's not very often that I take all 4 of them out together, but made an exception for this quick trip.  The darker brown one is my oldest dog at 12 ½.  She's actually a really smart, super good dog who does well in public from a behavior stand point.  However, she suffers from a lot of anxiety and usually doesn't enjoy outings - unless food is involved and then she's all about it!  She also has a lot of health issues, so she's unable to do much in the way of exercise.  So, she usually gets to live it up at home most of the time.

Sunday
Aaptive "Smoking Guns" Arm Workout

I had done this workout once before and wasn't sure how I felt about it.  After a second go round, I'm still not sure I love it and much prefer the one I did last week.  However, I guess it's good to mix things up from time to time.

Weekly Workout Recap: 3/23/2020 - 3/29/2020

I finally feel like I found my workout mojo again after being off kilter ever since the gym closed.  While the only running I did this week was when I ran my virtual race (mostly because of concern over my calf, which is still sore and bothering me quite a bit when I try to do certain things), I feel like I got decent exercise all week.

Overall, I just felt good about where I was this week, which was a welcome change from the previous two.

Here is this week's Recap...

Workouts:

Monday
3.3 mile walk, along the same route I did for the Women's Day Virtual 5K

Tuesday
I Run 4 Rescues Virtual 5K Race

Wednesday
1.5 mile easy walk

My calf was still bother me quite a bit post race and I wanted to take it easy, while still getting a little movement in and testing things out to see if walking would help stretch the calf out any.

Thursday
3.3 mile walk, along the same route I did for the Women's Day Virtual 5K

Again the calf was bothering me some, but definitely better.

Friday
Half an hour of the Just Dance 2020 Game for the Nintendo Switch

Saturday
Leg Workout

I braved Walmart for some supplies, and while I was there I bought myself some light ankle weights.  I came home and did a half an hour of leg exercises using the weights.

Sunday
9.25 mile bike ride, along the canal where I ran my race on Tuesday.



I stopped along the way to take a photo of one of the ducks that calls the canal it's home...



I had been considering buying myself an inexpensive bike but just hadn't done it yet.  With everything that is going on, I thought maybe it was time to do so.  I have to say I really enjoyed the ride a lot and am looking forward to the next one.  It did feel like a HUGE splurge spending the money when finances are so uncertain, but I guess if I'm going to be off work I'd rather be spending the time doing things that are healthy for me instead of sitting in front of the TV or the computer.

I Run 4 Rescues Virtual 5K Race Report

I signed up to run the I Run 4 Rescues Virtual 5K quite a while ago, maybe before I'd really even gotten too far back into running.  I can't remember exactly.

I totally admit it. I got sucked in by the adorable dogs and the fact that the shirt and metal would contain my favorite color combo...



I've actually had my race packet for quite a while, but I wanted to be at a point where I could actually RUN the race before I did it so I had been holding off.

I decided to do the run on Tuesday evening. It was my first official day in quarantine so I was off work and it seemed as good a time as any.  I wanted a change of scenery from the route I ran for my last virtual 5K, so I opted for an out and back course on the trails along side the water collection canals that run throughout the area.

On to the Race Report...

I drive to the point where my neighborhood connects to the canal trails and park the car. I get myself prepared and take a pre-race photo...



I set my running app on my phone and my Apple Watch, and then I take off.

And instantly realize that I forgot to delay my passcode requirement on my phone. (It drives me insane having to type it every time I want to check my distance, so I always change it during runs.) So, I spend the first several minutes of my run fiddling with that to get it turned off.

The trail runs East-West, so I either have to run into the sun on the way out or the way back. I decided to get it over with, thinking maybe it'll be a little higher in the sky at the start and not quite so blinding.

Almost instantly I fall into a nice easy rhythm and the run feels great. Not too far into the course, I pass by the small rec center near my neighborhood and the area is busier than I'd prefer for a run during quarantine. So, I spend a significant amount of time running off the trail and then back on to avoid people coming toward me.

Maybe .75 miles in, I reach a main road that I need to cross and have to wait for the light to change. I use the time for a water break and actually remember to pause the timer on my app. The light finally changes and I restart my app and take off running again.

I'm still in a nice steady grove, having zero issues. I'm in that perfect place where everything is in sync and I'm not struggling in the slightest. I'm enjoying my music but it's not having to pull me through. My mind is aimlessly wandering about, taking in my surroundings, thinking about how good the run feels, pondering what I am going to do with my upcoming days while in quarantine.

I check my app to see my distance (which is one of the worst things about a virtual race in my opinion!) and see that I'm about 1.4 miles in - almost at the halfway point. I can see that I am approaching another main road not too far up ahead, and decide to make that my turn around point. I know that it's going to be a little farther out than necessary, but I figure it will allow me a nice little cool down walk from the end of the 5K back to my car.

I get to the road and use the turn around for another water break, and then take off running again. I'm still going strong and having no issues. I'm thinking how pleasant the run is and how surprising it is after not having run for more than two week. I'm thinking it's nice to have the sun at my back instead of running into it, and I decided to snap a selfie...



I hit somewhere around 2.6 miles and I could feel myself starting to get tired. I was reaching the point where I needed a song to really pump me up and keep me moving. I started skipping through songs searching for the right one, when "Let's Go" by Trick Daddy popped up.

YES! Perfect!

I'm wondering if the song is long enough to take me the rest of the way through the race. When all of a sudden...

POP!

And OUCH!!!

WTF??!!

The middle of my right calf has this insane twitching popping sensation go through it and it INSTANTLY seizes up. I can't figure out if I tore something or pulled something or if it is just an insane cramp.

All I know is it freaking HURTS!

I instantly stop and try to stretch it out. I try massaging it. But nothing is really helping.

I try walking but I can't without a major limp.

I decide that I really think what I felt was an insane spasm and then the muscle seized. I really think it is just a horrible cramp, and I decide to just ride it out. I have to get back to the car regardless, and walking was so miserable I decide to try running. Oddly enough it is infinitely better. The running is stretching the calf muscle more than walking and it helps. So, I take off running again, albeit a lot slower.

Pretty quickly, I reach the main road that I need to cross, only this time I do forget to pause the app. While I'm standing waiting for the light to change, I can feel the calf tightening again but once I start running again it feels a little better.

I make it the rest of the way and call it a done deal as soon as I hit 3.1 miles. I stop my app and Apple Watch, and don my metal.

I did it!

I take a few post run photos with my metal...





Then hobble my way back to the car.

Here are the results from my app...



I am thrilled that the first two miles were faster than the last race. Even the third mile wasn't too awful considering part of it was when I forgot to pause the app while waiting for the light, and of course I was walking/hobbling along for a bit of that, too.

Weekly Workout Recap: 3/16/2020 - 3/22/2020

Here is this week's Recap...

Workouts:

Monday
Today was supposed to be my appointment with my Personal Trainer, but given the current state of things I opted to cancel and did some Yin Yoga at home instead.

Tuesday
Aaptiv "Bedtime Bliss" Stretching Workout and "Tranquil Rest" Medication

Wednesday
Yin Yoga

Thursday
3 - 3 ½ mile walk

Friday
Online Cardio Workout Video - which pretty much kicked my butt.

Saturday
2ish mile hike with two of the babies - click here to read more about it and see some photos.

Sunday
2ish mile walk with one of the fur babies and some friends, keeping proper social distance, of course.

I have to say that I really struggled with my workouts this week.  It took me until Thursday to get it together enough to get any real exercise, and no running was done.  I usually do most of my workouts at the gym immediately after work and most of my runs are on the treadmill.

With thy gym closed, I am having a hard time.  I really need the routine of going straight from work because once I walk in the door at home, either the to do list starts nagging or the couch starts calling and all good intentions go out the window.  I have to work tomorrow, but then I am off work for the foreseeable future.  So I figure I only need to ride it out one more day and then I'll have more than enough time to figure out a new workout routine and plan some outdoor runs.

Life in the Apocalypse

It's been a rough week.

Now there's an understatement if there ever was one.

On Monday my boss returned from vacation and instantly put new cleaning protocols in place to deal with the COVID-19 pandemic.  It was stressful to say the least!  We had a full schedule of patients, and it is hard to stay caught up on the best of days.

Nevermind with all the extra cleaning.

The standard schedule certainly doesn't allow time to sanitize every inch of the rooms between each person, and as crazy as it is we weren't having any cancellations, so of course we were behind schedule the entire time.  People weren't upset; they were happy we were taking the precautions, but it's still stressful to be behind all day.

By the time I got home at the end of the day on Wednesday, I was on complete and total overload.

To be honest, I felt like I had completely lost my grip on my my sanity.  

I felt like my entire body and brain were vibrating from having to be so zeroed in to my every action for three straight days. The second I walked in the door, I poured myself a kahlua and cream, and didn't stop refilling my glass until I had stopped vibrating.

To add to the fun, my boss spent the entire week insisting that we were NOT closing. (She finally changed her mind this morning!) So, I spent the week oscillating between fear for my health and concern over the irresponsibility of not social distancing as recommended.

By the time Friday rolled around reality had fully settled in, as many of my commune friends started sharing the news that they were suffering from pay cuts, schedule cuts, lay offs, and straight up job loss.

By mid-week, I could feel myself spiraling out of control and I could tell some of the old mental and emotional health demons I thought I'd laid to rest were rearing their ugly heads.  I fought a long hard battle out of the abyss and I AM NOT GOING BACK THERE!

So, I decided that I am going to concentrate on trying to do things to decompress and escape the craziness. 

So, here is my Week in Review thus far...

Thursday: I went for a 3 - 3 ½ mile walk near my house.  I was going to take a few photos but I completely forgot.

Saturday: I took two of my dogs on a nice easy 2ish mile hike at a nearby park, where I did remember to take some photos!

Photo of the rock formations at the park...



I walked around the formations, not up them.  I opted to take one of my 12 year old dogs and I knew that would be too much for her.

Me with two of my goobers.  The larger dog is the older one, and the smaller dog is much younger.  She is a rescue, so I'm not sure of her exact age but I think she's around two...



Always up for a fun adventure...



Here was where the largest number of people I saw were located, except for in the parking lot.  Normally, I would have taken at least one trek up and down the stairs, but I was taking the social distancing thing very seriously and didn't want to have to pass too closely to anyone.  So, I opted to take a photo from afar today...



Another photo of me with one of the dogs...

And one of a little friend I met along the way...



Also, I have to say that if ever my tattoo was a perfect fit, this is it.  I really am so thrilled that I was able to get it before all of this insanity settled in.  It's been serving as the best reminder to maintain control of what I have control over and to just surrender to the rest.  Worrying will do no good, so take it one day at a time and just deal with whatever presents itself that day...

Weekly Workout Recap: 3/9/2020 - 3/15/2020

I made it one of my 2020 New Year's Goals to close all of my Apple Watch Rings every day in January.  I was successful and decided to continue the goal into February.  I managed to make it though the second month without missing a day, and I'm still going strong.

(For anyone not familiar with the Apple Watch Rings, they are Move, Exercise, and Stand. For the Move ring, you have to burn a certain number of calories a day. For the Exercise ring, you have to do 30 minutes of movement a day. For the Stand ring, you have to move for 1 minute out of every hour for 12 hours a day.)

I manage to close my Move and Stand rings without too much major effort.  However, I do have to work to ensure that I get my 30 minutes of movement in every day for the Exercise ring.  It may not always be the most strenuous or ambitious of workouts, but something is better than nothing and the goal keeps me focused on my health and exercise daily.

Here is a rundown of this week's Workouts:

Monday
Leg Day with my Personal Trainer

One of the things that I have really struggled with in terms of the personal training at my gym is the way the workouts are handled.  Basically, each body part is worked out in a rotating cycle at each weekly appointment.  So, approximately every 5-6 weeks a body part is repeated but the workout is never the same.  It is impossible for me to actually gauge my improvement because I'm never doing the same exercises.  I don't think the trainer really has a good gauge on my improvement, or lack there of, either because it constantly feels like the workouts are either way too hard or too easy.

This one was way too hard and it took until Friday before I could even walk normally again.  I was so sore that it hurt to try to move to get comfortable to sleep and I had to use my hands to get up from a seated position.  So, even though it was not my plan nor my intent for the week, I ended up not running at all because I was so sore.

Tuesday
Stretching

Since I could barely move from Monday's Leg Day, I wasn't up for much in the way of a strenuous workout.  I was relying on the rest of my body to help me function and I wasn't about to make moving any harder than it already was so I opted for 30 minutes of nice easy stretching.

Wednesday
Aaptiv "The Gun Show" Arm Workout

I was feeling a bit lazy after Tuesday's stretching so I decided I needed to put forth a little more effort today.  I have a membership to the Aaptiv App, and I've found a few workouts on there that I really like.  This is one of them, and I opted to do it today.  I just went a little easier on the weights so I wasn't overly sore since my legs were still pretty miserable.

Thursday
Yin Yoga

I also have a really awesome Yin Yoga App that I use pretty often, and opted for some leg poses, hoping they'd help the soreness.

Friday
Total Body with my Personal Trainer

I had two training session this week since I missed one a few weeks ago.  I have to admit that this workout was pretty miserable.  It was a sequence of 7 exercise that work your entire body - only several of them were way above my current ability.  So, I could feel myself straining and using the wrong muscles to compensate since the muscles I was supposed to be using were too weak to handle the workout.  But at least I didn't end up overly sore, so that's something!

Saturday
Hiking

On Saturday afternoon, I took two of my dogs for a hike with some friends.  The hike was pretty flat and easy, so not much in the way of a strenuous workout but it was really nice to get outside and absorb some nature.

Here's a photo of my two hooligans enjoying the walk.  One of them so much so that she wouldn't look at the camera...



And one of the gorgeous view on the hike...



I've lived in Arizona long enough that I forget that most of the country is still in the middle of winter this time of the year.  Our temperatures have been in the 70's for quite a while now and we've even had a handful of days in the 80's.  This is definitely the time of year to live here, and I've been trying to enjoy it while I can!

Sunday
Aaptiv "The Gun Show" Arm Workout

I opted to repeat the same workout as Wednesday since I really do like this one.

Overall not a bad week, but I was bummed that I was too sore to get any runs in this week.  Granted, I could have gone for a run today but I think I had a case of the lazy Sundays.  I was trying to get caught up on random life stuff and just never found the motivation to leave the house.

Total Bummer

The 5K that I was signed up to run on March 22nd was canceled due to COVID-19 and switched to a virtual race.

Boo. Hiss.

I'm super bummed! I completely understand, and I agree with the decision. I was just really looking forward to running my first actual race in 13 years! Also, I really have no interest in running a third virtual race this spring, as I've already ran one and have signed up for another. I would have much preferred a refund but from what I can tell that isn't an option.

Oh well, what can you do?!

I guess I'll lace up my shoes and hit the roads again for another virtual race next Sunday.  This one will be different in that it is the only one where I will be running at the same time as other runners.  The other two virtual races are ones that you run whenever you want to run it within a time frame, so I guess that's something.

In Other News:

I decided to discontinue my personal training.  I originally signed up simply for the accountability to get my butt in the door.  I wasn't loving how the training is approached at this gym, but since it had been serving it's purpose I have continued with it.  However, my current trainer altered his schedule and I was looking at either going at a time that isn't a good long-term fit with my schedule or else starting over with another new trainer, the third since I started.  I wasn't really up for either option so I decided to cancel.

Of course, you pay way in advance and have to give 30 days notice to cancel so I still have another 5-6 weeks of training sessions left.  So, now I'm left with the dilemma of deciding if I continue with the sessions until they are used up or do I bail on the gym as recommended because of this darn coronavirus?  The sessions don't expire, so the smart thing to do is to put the session on hold for a while but my personality says to use them all up and get my money's worth now because you just never know.

To be honest, I'm not as concerned about getting the coronavirus from the gym as I am about passing it on.  Because of my occupation, I am pretty much guaranteed to get it.  I literally have people breathing on my hands for 8 hours a day, not to mention how close my face is to theirs.  No matter how careful I am about using hand sanitizer and washing my hands, it is inevitable that I am going to unconsciously touch my face and contaminate myself or simply get it from breathing in the same air space as someone who has it. Since it takes up to 14 days to show symptoms, I'm concerned about not knowing I am infected and perpetuating the spread of it.

I've really been giving a lot of thought to more or less imposing a self-quarantine, and only going to work and for food and other necessities.  I can't stand the thought that I could unknowingly cause the death of someone by passing on COVID-19 before I was aware that I had it.  These are some really strange times with some very tough decisions we all have to make, and the view points range from one extreme to the other.  Thus far my take has been: I'm going to stock up like crazy and hoard all the things so I can try not to leave my house in the thick of it and cause any unnecessary deaths.

It's going to be an experience watching this entire thing unfold in the coming months, that's for sure!

Weekend Running Recap

Friday

I have been doing a half-assed attempt at completing a couch to 5K program since the end of January.  The issue is that the program is a little too easy for me and it's an 8 week program but when I started it I only had 6ish weeks until the 5K that I am signed up to run.  So, I haven't exactly been following it.

Some days I have done two of the run/walk session back to back.  Other days, I've used it as a loose guide as I have done my run/walk for the day. Now that I'm nearing the end of it, I use it to motivate me to keep running for the longer stretches before taking a walk/water break.  However, I still usually run longer than the program calls for.

On Friday afternoon, I had an appointment with my personal trainer at the gym.  I got out of work a bit early and had time to kill before hand, so I opted for a brief run on the treadmill.  I actually stuck to the day's C25K schedule which was warm up, run 10 minutes, walk 3 minutes, run 10 minutes, cool down.  I made it a very slow 2 miles in 30 minutes.  I hadn't even planned on running and I could feel the lingering effects of the cold from the beginning of the week so I kept it nice and easy.

Saturday

I ran the Zooma International Women's Day Virtual 5K.  I read about the race on a running blog I stumbled upon as I was out wandering the blogosphere. You can read about my run here, as I decided to write a race report even thought it was a virtual one.

I didn't mention it in the race report, but I ran the exact same route that I ran last Sunday, only in reverse. I was running on the sidewalk, not the road, but I still decided it would be smarter (and easier on my neck) if I ran facing oncoming traffic so I switched the direction of the run. Going the other direct came up about .35 miles shorter. Very odd.

Those inconsistencies drive me bonkers and I'm already getting frustrated with how different my Apple watch and the running app on my phone are with pace and distance. I've been entertaining the idea of getting a new Garmin. I know that when I finally broke down and got one when I was training previously it made all the difference and was well worth every penny I spent on it!

Sunday

I'm really trying to complete the C25K program before the 5K I have scheduled on March 22. I have 2 weeks left of the program and the race is two weeks from today.

Destiny.

So, I decided to head out first thing this morning and complete the next run on the program, which was warm up, 20 minute run, cool down. I'm not used to running as soon as I get up so I felt a bit sluggish and it took me a while to really get moving. I could tell my legs were a little tired from the third day in a row of running, but overall the run felt fine. I made it a little over 2 miles, but walked a little of the last one, as I wasn't interested in being an over-achiever this morning and stopped as soon as I hit the 20 minute mark.

Splits:

Mile 1 12:03
Mile 2 12:31

Temp: 71° F

Zooma International Women's Day Virtual 5K Race Report

I debated about writing a race report for a virtual race but then I figured, why not? If you want to read up on the virtual race I ran you can do so here.

Without further ado, on to the report...

I took my photo with my bib as instructed, set my apple watch and the running app on my phone and took off down the driveway.



Literally 20 steps into the run my left foot lands wrong and my ankle instantly starts hurting. I briefly wonder if it's going to set off the old ankle injury but within a matter of seconds it is back to feeling normal and I continue on my way.

About .25 miles into the run I am already feeling tired and wanting to just turn back, but I know this is going to be a mental run today, not a physical run, and tell myself to just suck it up and deal.   {Quite frankly those are the more important. It's easy to run when you feel like it - when you're well rested and everything feels perfect.  It's hard to run when you're coming off of being sick, exhausted, stressed, not properly fueled or hydrated, or just not feeling it.}

About .5 miles in, I make my way out of the neighborhood and turn to run on the sidewalk along one of the main streets. As I'm running all I can think of is how much nicer it is running along the roads here as opposed to in Indiana! Since I now live in a huge city, we have sidewalks everywhere - no more getting shoved off the roads into the weeds as cars pass by.

As I close in on the 1 mile mark, I make a turn and began running along a different road. I'm running directly into the sun Yuck! and into the wind Yay! and I'm still struggling.  I can feel myself speeding up because I'm tired and want it over but I also know that I can't sustain the pace and I'm going to crap out before I reach 3.1 miles if I don't slow down.  For a while my only focus is on the pace and trying to keep one I know I can stay with.

At 1.35 miles, I pass another entrance into my neighborhood and can hear the couch calling my name.  I ignore it and cruise on past and keep going. At this point, I really start to think about the point of this 5K.  I start to think about all of the women before me who fought some very hard won battles for the rights and freedoms that we have gained.  I start thinking about women in other countries and what many of them have to endure.  I just keep telling myself over and over, this run is nothing compared to the struggles of so many.  Just Keep Going.  Do it in honor of everything they have done for you and every other woman who now has the right to work, the right to vote, the right to make their own decsions, the right to have their own opinions.

Probably somewhere around 2 miles, I make another turn and am no longer running into the sun Yay! but now the wind is blowing across me. Yuck! Right at this point "Eye of the Tiger" comes on and it fires me up and keeps me moving for the rest of the song. Just as it finishes, I turn another corner and now the wind is to my back. Without the air, I feel hot and my legs feel heavy. I can tell my lungs are tired from being sick earlier in the week. I know they'd really love it if I stopped but they aren't getting their way.

Not today.

I'm about 2.5 miles into the run and I'm struggling. I am determined to actually RUN this race so except for the few short walk breaks to drink a little water, I'm running farther without stopping than I have thus far and I'm. freaking. tired. I search for a song to motivate me to keep going and finally settle on "Let's Go" by Trick Daddy. It works and I get fired up to end this thing strong.

I'm hanging in there, but I'm still exhausted. So my eyes are glued to my phone just waiting for the second that it hits 3.1 miles. It FINALLY does, and I slow to a walk and snap a post race selfie.



Of course, there is no official time, and I didn't actually stop my watch and app until I'd returned home which was a little farther than the 3.1 miles. So here's the best info I have for splits/pace:

Mile 1 12:07
Mile 2 12:18
Mile 3 12:09
Mile .4 16:33 (walking as soon as the .1 was done!)

Temp: 70° F

Letting Go is Hard

I'm sitting outside on the porch in my backyard as I type this, and it is bliss, I tell you.

PURE BLISS!

I live in a neighborhood but on a corner lot so my yard is larger than most. The neighbor behind me has a row of trees along the back of his property that affords him, and luckily me, quite a bit of privacy. I have a few mature trees (and some new ones that I wish would hurry up and grow faster!) that give me a lot of shade - which is HUGE in sunny Arizona!

My backyard really is an oasis. It feels more like being in a small park than in a residential yard.  One of the main reasons I purchased this house was for the incredible backyard space. I even caved in on some of my must have for the inside of the house for this yard. I knew it would be great for my dogs, and I envisioned enjoying it with friends on the regular, too.

Yet, I never freaking use it!

The ONLY reason I am out here right now, even though it is a perfect sunny 73° F, is because my living room couch is in for repairs. As I was trying to pick between the alternatives of places to use my laptop it dawned on me that I could come out here.

DUH!

I am supposed to have the couch back in 3 weeks, maybe during that time sitting out here will be come a new habit.

21 Days, and all that....

That would be awesome... because I'm at a point in my life where I need and want to make some changes with how I am living. Maybe more on that later, but for now back to my original intent for this post when I sat down to start writing it:

I think I'm having a bit of a blogger identity crisis. As I resurrect my running blog, I'm attempting to figure out the right fit for who I am now compared to who I was 14 years ago when I started this blog.

Back then, I was 'runnergirl' and that felt like the prefect fit. I was in my early 30's and I had lived a charmed life. I'd accomplished some things that I had worked hard for but life hadn't really dealt me any shitty hands yet. I was recently divorced, but even that was smooth and easy by divorce standards. Even though I was in my 30's, I felt young and carefree. I still felt like a girl.

I so don't feel like a girl any more.

Now, I'm in my mid 40's and my life hasn't been quite so charmed. While nothing horrific or tragic has happened (thankfully!) the past several years have not been easy and they have taken a toll. Instead of feeling significantly younger than my age, I now feel quite a bit older than I am. Life just feels like it takes more effort than it used to. I feel tired and beaten down and a bit lost.

And I freaking hate it.

Since I no longer feel like a girl, I feel like it is time to let 'runnergirl' go. Quite frankly, it is long past time and I should have done it back in 2013 when I made my first return to running. Only back then, I just couldn't do it. The main fuel behind the return was an attempt to reclaim my old life, so how could I possibly toss aside the very identity I was trying so desperately to get back?

In the words of Rachel Hollis (and maybe others), "The cost of your new life is your old one."  And as much as it pains me to do it, it really is time to let go of the old me and welcome in the new one.  Otherwise, I'm going to spend the next 40 years stuck in the past, waxing poetic over all that was but no longer is instead of getting out there and creating a new amazing life for myself.

I've been giving this a lot of thought over the past few days, trying to make sure that I wouldn't regret the change, and trying to figure out what new blogger name I wanted to use.  I think I've finally settled on something.  But first, I a little bit of background...

For the majority of my life I have wished my first name was Kate.  I'm not sure I could really explain it, but I just really like the simplicity of it and the fact that it is a single syllable.  My actual first name is a fine name and I don't dislike it.  It is just ridiculously common and it doesn't have a nickname associated with it that I like.  Ditto for my middle name.  So with no nicknames that I actually want to be called by, it just feels like everyone is overly formal when addressing me instead of having a more intimate nickname.  I do have a lot of old friends that call me 'Doc' because of my profession, and I don't mind that.  However, it's not something I would ever choose for myself as it feels more like a representation of something I do which is such a small part of who I actually am.

So, with all that being said I (think) I have finally settled on a nickname based off my last name as my new blogger name.  I'm going to try it on for size and see if it feels right as I head forward into this new but old journey of running and blogging about it.

I am, however, going to keep my blog url the same.  Because while I want to move forward and embrace some changes, I'm not trying to kick my old life, or anyone in it, to the curb.  I want people to be able to find me if they want to once again join me for this journey.

So, here's to updating my blog and creating a new blogger identity.  But first, I have to record a photo of my blog in its current state for posterity...

Because while I'm willing to walk forward into creating a new life for myself, I'm not willing to completely forget about the old one.

Spring Has Sprung!

Our weather is looking pretty darn good...

This is the time of the year when I love living in Arizona. The rest of the country is still bemoaning the lingering cold and we are well on our way to amazing temps.

It'll be interesting to see if we actually get any of that rain next week.  Even when it is in the forecast, we rarely see it.  More often than not when we do get rain it seems to come out of nowhere and be over in the blink of an eye.

Seriously?

Why is it that as soon as I get into a good rhythm of running I get sick?!

I started back to running near the end of December and by mid-January, I was fighting off some sort of crazy illness that seemed to linger for about 3-4 weeks. I finally kicked it to the curb and got my stride back, only to be hit with something else at the beginning of this week.

Ugh.

This ALWAYS happens. If I had the time and energy, I could link to post after post from the past where I mentioned the exact same thing happening.

I suppose there's something to be said for consistency but seriously?

A Bit About The Other Tattoo

So, I resurrected my running blog with a post about my new 13.1 tattoo commemorating my half marathon.

However, I completely neglected to mention the OTHER tattoo in the photo.

Mostly because I hadn't quite wrapped my mind around how exactly to explain that one yet.

I'm still not sure that I know just what to say, but I'm going to try anyway. So here goes...

About 4-5 years ago, I began using the word 'surrender' as my intention for yoga classes. It started out quite simply - as a reminder to just relax; to release the tension that I carry in my jaw, my neck, and my shoulders almost constantly; to not fight the poses, but to surrender to them.

From there it slowly morphed into a mantra for my entire life:

I use it to remind myself that sometimes I need to just surrender to what is. It is a reminder that no matter how much I might want to I can't, and I shouldn't, control everything.

I use it to remind myself that I need to surrender to being human, to making mistakes, to being wrong, and to not knowing everything. It is a reminder that I am not perfect and that I often make mistakes - and there is nothing wrong with that!

I use it to remind myself that sometimes in life you just have to 'surrender to the suck'. It is a reminder that the best things in life are usually the things that require the most work. It is a reminder that I have to surrender to the process, and to doing the hard work, to get the results I want.

I also use it as a reminder to just enjoy the journey. Sometimes the best rides are the ones that we never intended to take, and maybe we'd all be a little happier if we learned to surrender to the current instead of tying to swim upstream.

Feeling ALL the Feels

I just spent the last few days reading all of my old posts, and a majority of the comments, and man oh man did it stir up a lot of memories.  And if I'm being really honest - a lot of emotions, too.

It also brought to light that I still use many of the exact. same. phrases. when I write.

I did read through my entire blog back in 2013 when I considered another go at running, but I don't remember it hitting me quite the same way that it has this time.

Maybe it's because I'm in a totally different place now than I was in both 2013 and 2015 when I considered a return to running. Maybe it's because I feel like I am finally coming out of the fog that I have been living in for the past 8 years.  Maybe it's because I am in shock over just how little my current life resembles my old one - and not necessarily in good ways.  Maybe it's because I feel like I really am back - and that's both thrilling and terrifying at the same time.

Right now I am filled with heart wrenching nostalgia for EVERYTHING.  The good.  The bad.  The ugly.  I want it all back - every single wonderful, miserable moment of 2006 & 2007.

I was on top of the world - only I didn't freaking know it.  I was blissfully ignorant to the compete shit storm my life would turn into just 4 short years later.

A shit storm that I didn't see coming and that is just now starting to subside.

I am staring to feel whole again.  I actually feel like myself again.  And while I don't quite feel on top of the world, I no longer feel at the complete bottom of it either.  My life may not be what I want it to be, but I'm finally at the point where I am physically, mentally, and emotionally capable of trying to improve it.

In both 2013 and 2015, I was so beaten down and broken that I was looking at running as a way to pull myself out of the abyss - because I had no idea what else to do.  I think I was longing for my old life so much that I thought if I started running again, it would bring back a piece of it.

Except, I forgot just how hard running can be.

Now that I am in a better place, the running is just naturally falling back into place, and I'm excited to create a space for it and welcome it back into my life - no matter how brief or how long its visit might be.

Taking it to The Great Outdoors

Today I did my first outdoor run in YEARS, and it felt pretty awesome!  Thus far I have been running solely on the treadmill at the gym - mostly out of convenience but a little bit because I figure the treadmill is easier on the old injuries than the roads will be.  But since I have a 5K coming up in 3 short weeks, I thought it was a good idea to get some actual outdoor runs under my belt between now and then.

Honestly, there wasn't anything noteworthy about the run.  I just wanted to record my spits for future reference, so here they are:

Splits:
Mile  1 12:59
Mile  2 11:25
Mile  3 12:18
Mile .5 16:25

Temp: 75°F

Here I Go, Again!

OK, so it's not 2 years this time - instead it's almost 5, but here I am once again writing about a return to running.

Only this time it's not me considering a return, I'm actually back!

But let's back up a bit shall we?....

First, here's a not so brief recap of the past few years that have brought me to where I am today:

In July 2016, I began working 4 days a week for a decent boss at a job that I actually enjoyed. Not too long after that, I was able to give up the two extra days I had been working for other employers. So after 5 very long years, I was finally able to stop working the insane 6 day a week work schedule that I had been maintaining the majority of the time since I moved.

As my work stress levels began to slowly decrease, my overall well being began to improve and I started to have time to actually take care of myself. I began doing more things that I enjoy and even found time to begin volunteering at an animal shelter, where I became friends with a few of the other volunteers. Some of us eventually morphed into a group that we jokingly call 'the commune' and for the first time since relocating to Arizona, I feel like I have a sense of community and a real support system.

In January 2018, I joined Weight Watchers with my mom and managed to lose the majority of the extra weight I had been carrying around for way too long. I made it to my goal weight of 139 lbs and became a lifetime member. I managed to keep all the weight off for a while, but then I slowly let myself slide and gained some of it back.  However, this time I didn't let myself fall off the wagon completely and I am once again at my goal weight and maintaining it.  Of course, I'd still love to weigh a few lbs less than I do, but the older I get the harder it is to drop even a pound or two, so I'm content - at least for now!

In July 2019, I had the opportunity to change jobs to an office just a few miles from my house.  No longer having the 30-35 minute commute each way and being close enough that I can run home every day on my lunch hour for my four (I added two since I last blogged!) dogs, really had a huge impact on my schedule and opened up a lot of options for me.

Since I no longer had to rush home at the end of the day to let my dogs out, I decided to join a gym when I took the new job. I started off going right after work, but I knew I'd probably struggle with the motivation before too long.  So I also hired a personal trainer at the gym who I meet with once a week.  I have to admit that there were several weeks where that appointment was the only time I set foot in the gym.  However, as I started to move more I slowly started to see improvements in my overall well being and that motivated me to keep going.  I slowly increased my visits until I was going more often than not, which is where I am currently.

In December 2019, I read Rachel Hollis' book "Girl, Stop Apologizing" and something about it just really clicked with me and inspired me to start running on the treadmill at the gym.  I never really decided to run, I just started running.  One run, turned into two, turned into signing up for a 5K (that is coming up very soon on March 22) and downloading a C25K training program to get me going.  I then signed up to for a Virtual 5K in support of Animal Rescues, that I will be running in the near future.  And now I'm starting to eye longer races and wondering just how far I can go. I'm feeling hopeful because I've been running for more than 2 months and so far I haven't felt even a twinge from my old injuries, and I'm wondering if all the yoga I've done has made the difference.

I really feel like I have made a lot of changes for the better in recent years, especially when it comes to my need for perfectionism.  These days one of my mantras is "Progress, not perfection!"  It really helps keep me on track when I do have an off day or two.  I get back to where I want to be so much faster than I used to before.

All I can say for now is that I'm not exactly sure where this foray into running is going to end up.  I have no real goals or plans.  However, I do feel like I'm actually back, which wasn't the case with the previous two attempts.  So stay tuned because I have a feeling that there will at least be a few new race reports on the blog in the not too distant future!

It's About Damn Time!

Today is a day 14 years in the making.

The proudest moment in my life was May 6, 2006 when I crossed the finish line of the Indianapolis Half Marathon. Not when I graduated from college. Not when I got accepted into optometry school. Not when I passed my board exams. Not when I got my Doctor of Optometry license. But when I crossed that freaking finish line.

Why?

Because training to run that half marathon was the hardest thing I have ever done. In. My. Entire. Life.

I’m sitting here with tears streaming down my face as I remember the feeling of that accomplishment. As I remember what it felt like to have just ran 13.1 miles. As I remember how strong and powerful I felt. As I remember how proud I was of myself.

I drew strength from that accomplishment for quite a while. But sadly, that source of strength eventually diminished until it almost became more a source of shame. Shame because I had to stop running due to an injury. Shame because I never accomplished my ultimate goal of completing a full marathon. Shame because I felt like a quitter.

BUT NOT ANY MORE.

Today is the day that I reclaim that sense of accomplishment. Today is the day that I remind myself that I am strong. I am powerful. I am capable. I can do hard things. Today. Yes, today is the day that I remind myself that I am a mother fucking bad ass!

Because once upon a time I RAN 13.1 FREAKING MILES!

And that’s a big deal.